Trust

Raising my support for the mission field has not been an easy task. When I went to Africa short-term, I had to raise one sum of money, but now I'm raising supporters who give monthly so that I can stay on the field. Sometimes I feel like I'm constantly talking about myself, hoping that someone will feel that God is calling them to support me monthly.

This last week I've felt completely burnt out from support raising. I told the Lord, "I feel so selfish! I'm always talking about me! Can't I just forget about me and just concentrate on life and other people?" That's when I realized that I had been slowly forgetting the one source of my support- the Lord. He is the one who provides for me, and it doesn't matter if everyone I talk to is interested in supporting me, or if no one is. He'll get me to the field when He wants me there!

So a week ago, as I drove up to a church I was visiting and stepped out of my car nearly in tears from frustration and burn-out from support raising, I knew what the Lord was asking of me that day- "Let Me raise the support for you!" I felt my hands clench like I was trying desperately to hang on to what I felt was my responsibility to do.

But it was His to do.

So I let Him. As soon as I stepped into the door of the church, some of my supporters came up and welcomed me, asked about me, and told me that they were talking to the church about raising more support for me! More was accomplished that Sunday than I had imagined. And I didn't do a thing. He did!

I found myself just a few days ago battling again with trying to raise support myself and stressing about the best tactics in support raising. Then I realized that I was doing His job. Trying to do the job of the One who is ultimately in charge of the end result.

What peace to know that He will accomplish this task much better than I could ever imagine it! All I have to do is trust. He is such a loving Father!